"We got the esmarkers and esstickers or somesing"
- Jon Esteban
If you are a loyal follower and reader of this blog you may already know that my friend Jon Esteban is terrified of buying things off Craigslist from strangers. He always thinks he's gonna get molestated or something. So when he found a great deal on Craigslist from some lady in Mountain View he made sure I would be able to accompany him on this dangerous voyage. We departed from our humble abodes at around 3'o clock and headed towards the unknown. Armed with nothing but our cellphones and manhood(s), Jon and I brought the car to a shaky stop in front of the woman's rundown apartment in East Side Mountain View. Tumbleweed tumbled across the dusty road as an old man sat on the curb crying sad tunes into his harmonica. I wiped the gallon of sweat nestled in the grooves of my forehead as Jon did a quick perimeter check to scout for possible escape routes. He found none.
They say there's a guardian angel for every individual. A heavenly being who watches your every step. An invisible hand ready to reach out and save you from sudden crushing death. Well, if that's the case, I know my guardian angel was right by my side today. It was a miracle we made it out of that dreaded apartment building alive.
Jon and I walked slowly towards the apartment entrance gate. I stared at the gate handle. Jon stared at the gate handle. Old rust covered what may once have been a beautiful golden knob. The thin and spiraly trees nearby seemed to laugh at us from above. The leaves, betraying their natural green state, had taken a reddish hue--the color of blood. We hesitated for what seemed like two seconds, then I took the initiative and turned the handle. I gulped the biggest gulp I had ever gulped. There was no turning back now.
Experts say the chances of a fully grown grizzly bear attacking a human are very slim. Bears stick to their areas, and humans stick to their own. No one crosses paths and no one gets hurt. Experts also say that if one does encounter a bear, the first thing to do is make loud, aggressive sounds and gestures in an attempt to scare off the beast. Jon and I knew nothing about this.
We made a few steps into the empty courtyard. I surveyed the scene before us: rows of apartments, each with a clean doormat and properly trimmed bushes hugging the footpath. There was no sign of life aside from the bushes and grass. No children's toys laying out in the yard. Not a ripple in the apartment pool. Everything seemed too perfect. Too quiet. The dead silence came to a halt with the jolting crash of the entrance gate behind us. Jon and I looked at each other. This was the beginning of the end.
- Jon Esteban
If you are a loyal follower and reader of this blog you may already know that my friend Jon Esteban is terrified of buying things off Craigslist from strangers. He always thinks he's gonna get molestated or something. So when he found a great deal on Craigslist from some lady in Mountain View he made sure I would be able to accompany him on this dangerous voyage. We departed from our humble abodes at around 3'o clock and headed towards the unknown. Armed with nothing but our cellphones and manhood(s), Jon and I brought the car to a shaky stop in front of the woman's rundown apartment in East Side Mountain View. Tumbleweed tumbled across the dusty road as an old man sat on the curb crying sad tunes into his harmonica. I wiped the gallon of sweat nestled in the grooves of my forehead as Jon did a quick perimeter check to scout for possible escape routes. He found none.
They say there's a guardian angel for every individual. A heavenly being who watches your every step. An invisible hand ready to reach out and save you from sudden crushing death. Well, if that's the case, I know my guardian angel was right by my side today. It was a miracle we made it out of that dreaded apartment building alive.
Jon and I walked slowly towards the apartment entrance gate. I stared at the gate handle. Jon stared at the gate handle. Old rust covered what may once have been a beautiful golden knob. The thin and spiraly trees nearby seemed to laugh at us from above. The leaves, betraying their natural green state, had taken a reddish hue--the color of blood. We hesitated for what seemed like two seconds, then I took the initiative and turned the handle. I gulped the biggest gulp I had ever gulped. There was no turning back now.
Experts say the chances of a fully grown grizzly bear attacking a human are very slim. Bears stick to their areas, and humans stick to their own. No one crosses paths and no one gets hurt. Experts also say that if one does encounter a bear, the first thing to do is make loud, aggressive sounds and gestures in an attempt to scare off the beast. Jon and I knew nothing about this.
We made a few steps into the empty courtyard. I surveyed the scene before us: rows of apartments, each with a clean doormat and properly trimmed bushes hugging the footpath. There was no sign of life aside from the bushes and grass. No children's toys laying out in the yard. Not a ripple in the apartment pool. Everything seemed too perfect. Too quiet. The dead silence came to a halt with the jolting crash of the entrance gate behind us. Jon and I looked at each other. This was the beginning of the end.
